The Seventh Sense

Sunday, 16th Jan 2011

4:14 Pm, We reached cantonment railway station, well in advance for the shatabdi which is expected to arrive by 4:40 Pm. Usually that’s kind of well in advance in my books, as its been always a case of arriving in the last minutes to the station. But I didnt mind arriving early today as its always a pleasure being with my uncle who came for a function from Chennai. His attitude is infectious, the way he goes about things is something I admire always. A fighter who always wears a smile even in difficult of situations, in summary he is as cool as a person I have seen.

            2:45 Pm. Got a call from my aunt, checking with me if I have left home from my uncle’s place where we were there for a function. I have told my uncle that I would drop him to the railway station. Whenever we get together for a family function, one or the other way we would end up playing cards and this function isn’t an exception. Well, how time flies while playing cards is beyond me. Knowing how I used to catch train, I have started getting calls already, as I was talking to my aunt, I get a call from my father and another call from another aunt. Over the years they were never happy about the way I get ready, being on time to the railway station is something which they don’t think is wise. “You got to start early, account for traffic jam, what if the vehicle you travel breaks down?” I agree, they have valid argument, especially my father doesn’t enjoy it a bit. For some reason though, it so happens that I reach the station just on time and never in advance, even when I was about to start for my marriage, I just made it to the station, thought I had missed the train at one point.  to note though, never missed a train till date. Touch wood!!!

            4:14 Pm. For reason unknown to me, the cantonment station weared a deserted look. Probably not many trains at the moment I thought. As my uncle got down the bike and started the walk towards platform, I proceeded for parking. I was issued the parking ticket and was asked which train, for which when I answered Shatabdi, “It doesn’t stop here” was the immediate answer. I didn’t know for a moment what hit me, it was shock of such a magnitude. If it would have been for my travel probably I wouldn’t have taken that that badly. It was my uncle who is travelling. Just as I started realizing what was happening, my uncle who was talking to the auto person near the platform got to know the same. He must have been as startled as me. He was walking towards me when I asked him the departure time of the train from City (It’s the main railway station in Bangalore, near to Majestic bus station). It takes about 10-15 mins for trains to reach cantonment. Though I know the dep time is 4:25, I still asked him hoping he would tell different time. Usually, will always have a plan B, that’s not possible in this case since Shatabdi doesn’t stop anywhere. The auto driver offered a 10 mins drive promising he would ensure that my uncle would catch the train. I wasn’t ready to allow my uncle to go in auto, I was not convinced that auto can reach faster than a bike, well he must be knowing some shortcut, but still I cannot sit back and do nothing. I knew Im taking risk since I don’t know the route to city station from cantonment. All this happened within a minute. We started and few metres ahead asked for direction from auto person who was standing at the entrance. “Shortest route to City station” as I asked him hurriedly, “There is nothing like short or long route, only one route” it was a punch dialogue said in a typical movie style, though I was in no mood to be entertained., I was nervous or anxious or tensed…. Not sure what that state is exactly, probably “Houston, we have a problem” kind of statement might be the right phrase. Picked up few initial directions from him and started out with very little hope of catching the train.

            3 Pm. Driving on Sunday afternoon is always a free ride without traffic. I dropped out of the card’s game to avoid anymore calls from people at home. As such original plan was to go by bus since I didn’t travel by bike that day. My cousin gave his bike since without bike it looked unlikely that I may reach home on time. His is “CBZ extreme” and is powerful than the “Shine” I own. Handling any bike other than what you are used to always is a challenge, dynamics change with respect to Brake/Clutch/acceleration and in general balance concerned. I have driven it earlier and without any doubt loved it for that bit extra power. While driving home, as expected enjoyed the drive and decided I would drop my uncle in this vehicle only. Reached home in about 10 mins and while I was parking the bike, this thought came that I should probably check whether this train would stop in Cantonment. Few hours earlier during the function only we have decided that I would drop in “Cant” rather than “City” since it’s much easier to access the platform. This decision was ofcourse taken with the due background as I have boarded Shatabdi from Cantonment and so is another aunt of mine who also felt its better to board in “Cant”. For some reason it was lingering in my mind may be I should check if this train does stop in “Cant”. My brain though insisted that I needn’t to since if one Shatabdi stops, other one also will.

            4:20 Pm. Still we were in and around Cantonment station only due to the confusion on which road to take coupled with 2 stops in signal. Driving faster is not an option though it’s the need of the hour. Couple of reasons for that. One, route is not clear for me and have already missed a turn and had to stroll back literally. Another is that the handling of the bike, had it been “Shine” probably it wouldn’t have played in my mind, but now I had to be careful about the handling aspect of it as well. I used to feel so proud and even boast about how I have never missed a train. Well all that is going to shatter today. If my uncle misses the train, I will never hear the end of it in my family, probably I will never be let on my own to decide the time I want to leave home for station. My uncle, being cool may not mind missing the train, but the plans he would have had will go haywire on top of the loss of money. Its an odd time to catch a bus for Chennai as well, even if one is there and getting ticket is another task as that being Sunday. I should have checked if there is a stop, how complacent of me? I was admonishing myself. Though I was driving with intent, by the time we reached the nearabouts, it was already 4:25. Any hopes of catching the train (if on time) have vanished. I was upset and felt ashamed. Of  all the times, never thought I would miss the train today. I used to tell the secret how to not miss a train, is about knowing exact departure time and the boarding point. How grossly I miscalculated on the later, a lesson. Only relief was, at that point onwards the route is known to me and atleast I needn’t to stop anymore for asking directions.

            3:30 Pm. We started from home. Knowing it wouldn’t take that much of time to reach station, I was driving without urgency, stopping in advance even as the signal turns to yellow. As usual during the ride we were discussing various things and my uncle was telling me on how few months back there wasn’t a stop in cantonment. I was enjoying especially the very nice drive of the bike. As we neared the station it was around 4:15 and for reason unknown to me, cantonment station weared a deserted look.

            4:30 Pm. We are in the last signal and it was all over. Unless the train is late there is no chance that we would catch it. Well, I convinced myself that we drove all this while may be to give ourselves a chance if train is late. Strangely, I believed that there is a chance for train to be late, may be because couple of weeks back I heard someone mentioning it got delayed by 45 mins. I was telling my uncle that since it starts from Mysore, there could be a chance that train may be running late. Honestly at that moment I was more thinking though on how to get a bus for him, whether Majestic or KR market. Policeman was handling the traffic instead of the automatic signal which added to the extra few mins delay, this time though we aren’t too stressed since its already time and we are driving on the hope that train is running late. While we left cantonment we were asked to go to backside of the city station where the Shatabdi would start from. The moment policeman allowed us to go, drove directly to the backside, as we took the turn from where the platforms 6,7,8 would be visible, I heard a excited voice from my uncle, “Hey, that looks like Shatadbi”. Ah, yes there it was on platform number 7. Well, missing the train would be terrible from now. I stopped at the closest possible point from where he could alight and go, I was still in bit of a disbelief of this respite. The train was some 200 metres away only but looked very far at that moment. My uncle got down and started running, there was a person who was standing nearby the gate who came to me and told me not to get tensed as the train would be delayed by 15 mins since they are replacing the engine. Well god has saved once again. Parked the vehicle, which again was guided by the person. While I was about to move towards parking, he asked me to take platform ticket before entering the platform (which I would have anyways done otherwise as well), but his concern was a surprise to me.

            4:45 Pm. Now that we got the train, me and my uncle could laugh a bit. As the train started moving, waved at my uncle and started walking towards parking. As was about reach the entrance of the platform, I was asked if I was having platform ticket, looked up to see and it was same person as earlier, as I was wondering why, I realized in a moment that ticket collector was standing in the entrance. If I wouldn’t have bought the ticket, probably the same guy would have got it for me I reckon. But who was he and why he has taken such a care is beyond my understanding. As I got out of the platform, waved at him with a smile, the life looked beautiful, not only because we could get to the train, but with such wonderful people around, why it would look otherwise. As I called my cousin and explained this ride, I was told morning Shatabdi which starts from Bangalore stops in Cantonment and evening Shatabdi from Mysore doesn’t. Whatever be it, it was too close for comfort this ride and I realized how important it is to give respect and trust your instincts, well possibly a seventh sense in my opinion. Had I done that, this drama wouldn’t have happened. Hey but again, it wouldn’t have been this stronger message to trust those little indicative thoughts going forward, am thankful either ways

             Now. Many of my relatives don’t know all this happened including my parents and am sure in one of the family get together’s its going to be disclosed, it would be fun seeing their reaction , the legacy can continue though !!!

It’s Meme time…

Recently, one of my friend’s tagged me for Meme in her blog,(Thank you :)),  this is about set of random questions which one need to answer.Following is the Meme which I have been tagged to.Incidentally this is the first time I would be doing a Meme as such., anyways, here we go…

 

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 2. Write down what it says:

Book is “உலக சினிமா – பாகம் II” (World Cinema – Part II) written by Chezhiyan, one of my friend’s gave it to me. 

Page 18, line 2:

Bernardo Bertolucci

இவரது தந்தை திரைபட விமர்சகராகவும் கவிஞராகவும் இருந்தார்.

(It reads as “His father was a movie critic as well as a poet)

 

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first?

I feel the air, nothing else in line….

 

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?

30 mins back was watching a scene in a movie called “Muni” in the saloon

 

4. WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what time it is:

Probably 6:25 pm?

 

5. Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?

6:39 pm

 

6.With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?

Could hear the traffic in the nearby bridge especially Autos, someone is on phone in the nearby house…

 

7.When did you last step outside? where did you go?

3 hours and 15 mins before (its 6:42 now), went to my friend’s house then to my grandpa’s home

 

8.Before you came to this website, what did you look at?

Logged to GTalk and did some settings related changes to display the music which I’m listening…

 

9.Did you dream last night?

Thinking…. Thinking…. hmm actually I don’t remember…

 

10.When did you last laugh?

Well… tough one really, will laugh quite often. I think… if I have to pick something which has stuck to my mind.. then it was  couple of hours back in my friend’s house, who got recently married, we were just discussing variety of things and bursted out laughing  for the comments we passed

 

11. What is on the walls of the room you are in?

Plain walls on all the sides.. except for the TATA Sky cable which has been pinned on one side of the room.

 

12. Who is your latest crush?

Hmm… no one I would say… incase if that doesn’t sound convincing, then to ensure you believe, I know who would be the crush in future

 

13. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?

Honestly, I’m thinking… surprising that I don’t know what to do if I get that much amount of money??!!!????!!!! Well… I have started a list logically … will not go into the details…sticking to the question… probably it would be the Home theatre system!!!! which I have choosen sometime back to buy later….wait!!! it striked me now, actually it would be a house for my brother in Chennai… who is looking out for a change in accommodation

 

14. Tell me something about you that I don’t know:

Since I was tagged by Chaitra for this Meme, I assume that this information is for her. Well, I have won prizes right from 4th std till 12th grade in oratorical competitions… !!!

 

15. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?

Well, it would be some action to bridge the gap between those totally developed and under developed… inclusive of the rich and poor!!!

 

16. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her? a boy?

Ohoo… never thought I would answer this question in a blog… but anyways for fun… sometime back in office, during lunch table discussion, this topic came and for a girl I mentioned it as “Divya”!!! , hmm I know… you will think why… it was inspired out of a movie I think, dont remember that much, but in one of the sequences, someone would be calling out  this name and it sounded very nice to me, since then thought of this name.. I know its sounds weird..:). For boy, I would let my wife/relatives come up with names….

 

17. What is the last film you saw?

“Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom”

 

18. Who is your favourite super-hero?

I would pass this question, as not applicable

 

19. Would you ever consider living abroad?

Nope!!! probably short visits.

 

20. Your favourite sitcom :

Well easy, thats the only thing other than songs/sports I watch on TV. Would be straight away a programme (more or less all the channels air such shows) where they play the comedy clips from movies.

 

If I have to pass this/tag this to someone, then I would say Aditya,Bala, Sowmi,Sowmya… well couple of more friends are about to start theirs, will pass onto them later…

Life which is waiting to happen…

                         Looking back at life which has happened has invariably brought smile to me everytime, not that it was rosy all along, but even the painful of circumstances seemed to have made peace by now. Its not often I guess, that we find ourselves in a situation just sitting spending time for ourselves looking back and reflecting on the life we have lived so far. It was in this vein, once in a while I used to think, what if, I die the next moment? Will I be happy to have lived the life I have? Would there be peacefulness in heart for having through this all this while? Will there be contentment in heart about the happiness shared with the people around me?

                         In the last 3 months, it has been a journey through tough choices and decisions enforced via deadlock circumstances. It was not a new terrain as these were there ever since I moved away from home for studies 11 years ago, and then continued staying away since job also happened elsewhere. It was this period which taught aspects of life which I never knew. The dimensions of emotions through relationships with different walk of people in life have had a profound impact to say the least. Few years back, whenever things go wrong, the immediate reaction was to get out of it as quickly as possible with certain set of measures, and ensuring running into same problem in future was avoided, which rather blinded on introspecting something which was underlying, which made those corrective measures now look like quick fixes.

                       Personally, I feel now, life goes through us in phases. Each of the phases unveils its own beautiful experience, the experiences which I was blinded to sometimes. Just few months back, I guess I was blinded to one such phase, the phase which thrilled me for long that I probably failed to question its existence strongly with authority. It was then started this last 3 months, a phase of life I started to note seriously. Sequence of events opened up a thought process, a process which unraveled a new dimension within me. It was a phase where the mind was torn between wanting something to happen and being desperate.

                        As far as I could recollect, in each walk of life right from school days, it seems like life has opened up in a pleasant way. Each phase of life is a beautiful chapter of a story in itself. A self contained path which would lead us to the next stage, the path where there is no need to look outside for guidance to be happy. In comes in such paths are those friendships, relationships where emotional attachments start to happen. It is in principle of life I guess that each person in our life is for reason, some reasons being very subtle and some being very evident. Whenever the reason for their existence in our lives is fulfilled, they leave, for their purpose is served for us, they don’t do it intentionally, like when we look back, we would have left relationships behind without our knowledge that we were there for them when they would have needed it most. Some leave us without we noticing them, some would have come in, charmed us with their grace and when they leave, they leave us a warmth that only a heart can appreciate and we were never ever the same.

                        As it happened in my life, from one chapter to other, there was invariably an indication, an indication which makes sense to me only now. It was in my eight standard when I told my mom that I don’t want to study but to become an athlete, which forced her change my schooling from one town to other more to my dismay,it marked a beginning of a different chapter. It was a struggle getting through those four grades from 9^th to 12^th. When it came to choosing the profession, I was having a choice only in payment seats. I was hesistant going for payment seat in engineering college to avoid the burden on my parents, suggested I would go through polytechnic and join as a direct second year in college, but they convinced me to choose engineering. I was afraid, what if I won’t be able to do justice to the faith my parents are showing on me. Unlike the phase of change during my 8^th std, this was more scarier, probably first time some kind of responsibility? Choice was made and joined the college. It didn’t strike me that time it was a new chapter, a defining chapter which is going to mark the beginning of  what Im going to be in ten years from then.

                        Not very often, one gets a chance to realize without someone telling that there has to be change in us, a change which is necessary to become what we want to. Ofcourse such a change is triggered in most cases through a sequel of events which hurts, samething happened in college for me. I wasn’t aware of the principle on why it happened that time, but I only knew if I need to go the distance, there has to be a change personally to handle relationships well, be it friends or acquaintance or whoever it was. Till that moment, probably in the shadow of my parents all these never came into light? Not sure, but it was a transition which was necessary, a transition which I readily wanted to go through keeping in mind only short term. During those college days, never thought about whats going to happen after four years, where I will be and what I want to do, only desire was to get into a job, never did a homework to prepare myself for the same, what I then never realized was that life has already started its sculpting through the transition mentioned. The change which I took thinking in short term was actually the one which is going to be the base for what I desired, it was a beautiful subplot as I think of it now.

                        The journey through college was a gratifying experience. When I was out of college, never realized that I was into an open horizon where there are no boundaries or rules like I was used to, and that there will not be anyone who will spoon feed. It was a change, a change which as I see now is a new chapter. A chapter which would eventually question my basics and take out the confidence, like throwing a man into rough sea who doesn’t know swimming. It was hurting to start up with. Once into it, sense of comfortability started coming in knowing that at some point it would end. It was that adverse situation which taught what really strong means! It eventually took 18 months before I settled into the job I wanted to, well it was not without any sub plots… but then that’s how each chapter in our lives shape up I guess. Into the job, it was an ecstatic feeling, a sense of happiness which was an engrossing experience. Just when everything seemed settled, I was slated to be deployed to a different project which would need me to work in client’s place. It was a discomforting thought, a thought now I interpret as a new chapter which I was unaware of that time.

                         This was the chapter probably introduced things which were above my level. A new proposition in job as well as in relationships, things started slowly but once on the roll, it looked like finally some coherence was achieved. It was when there was again a change, a change which painfully taught me how to “Leave behind and move forward”. It was unclear to me on why all of a sudden such a aspect of life was exposed to me, though I felt Im running away from the problem, once through that uncertainity, it become familiar on what this pattern was about. Things started flowing smoothly again, there was a sense of happiness about what was happening, it was suddenly one day out of the blue, a decision was to be made, a decision about the career. Already leading into it was a sense of restleness which has started, which for some reason prompted me to change. I was negating it as I never found any valid reason to be doing so, but eventually it had to happen and it happened with that decision. Well there were no regrets though but rather a sense of relief which probably marked the beginning of a new chapter!

                         This was the phase probably when I started realizing that there are things to be done and to be taken care of, a phase where all those childhood fantasies and teenage thoughts were interpreted entirely in a different way. This is the same phase which carved out a new plot about relationships, it’s not about only friends or relatives but about each and every person who comes and goes. I was going through one of those real excitement phases in terms of happiness, I knew it wouldn’t last long for simple reason that sustaining such a level of improportionate happiness is just not possible. Though I questioned it, I knew I was blinded, rather allowed myself to since it felt nice to be in that state. Then it happened as expected, it was a crash landing. Had that not for the precaution probably it would have been worse, then it made sense to me on why I was taught “Leave behind and move forward” earlier.

                        There was a striking resembelance in each of these phases. Life never leaves us alone to face the adversity. There was always someone who comes in, temporarily takes the pain, guides through and once their purpose is met, if they are meant to leave, they leave. Some stay aside as pillars of strength making us believe life never gives something which we cannot handle. What’s more intriguing is that we will be prepared in advance without our knowledge for us to face it. I thank all those who have been that someone guiding me!!! Somehow through all this, it hits me that the running away from some problem is something which would not help in the long run and getting through is the best as there will always be someone/something which would see us through!!!

                        As I see now, I never thought of these patterns in life. Never thought of the phases of life, never realized that I was entering a new phase, not until now. Well, I guess we need to excel in each of the chapter’s without compromising being a human being, without being ruthless only to achieve something which we always wanted, be it money, fame or anyother. Who knows, probably all these little things when done right, could cumulatively bring all that what we wanted. As I look back, there was an indication whenever there was a change. With what was happening in the last few months, it feels to me now, life is about to bring in one such change. A new chapter yet again in my life, a different phase and a different learning. For the first time Im anticipating such a change and am eagerly awaiting for the freshness its going to bring. Im for sure about onething now, life is like an adventure only if we are not spellbound to certain aspects which cause a momentary heartache or for those events which are not in our control. If that happens, we start living every moment, only then we can really appreciate the pleasantness of life which is waiting to happen…

What to name?

                                Sometimes crowded bus journeys are fun, that’s what he feels.Invariably the time he starts to the office, he obviously ends up in those crowded buses. Three stops from where he boards the bus, is a college. Usually, after that stop, half of the bus becomes empty. Since he is used to travel in one particular timing, he knows most of the people travel at that same time. Usually, after the third stop, he gets a seat and he ensures he always sits in a window seat. With his handpicked choice of music beaming in his ears, he immerses himself into his own world. I leave it to him to take over from here.

                              It was a very pleasantful morning, it was one of those days, when outside climate makes you feel its only 6 am though its 8 , somehow, after getting ready, such a climate outside charges me with more enthusiasm. I was feeling very happy, as I walked towards the bus stop, there was a slight drizzle, without harming anyone it played its music over the air. The bus was on time, even the crowded bus didnt deter my mood, unlike other days, I preferred footboarding. It was the third stop, I stepped down giving way for others to get down, as I moved a bit aside to make way, something got my attention, an umbrella, a small one, just next to me. I couldnt see who was holding it. After everyone got down, one by one started getting in, as usual I chose a corner seat. The bus was almost full that day. As I sat and looked around, I saw the same umbrella, this time folded, naturally I looked up to see who is holding….how do I say? Wait..I need to regroup, I dont get any superlatives at this point, she is the most beautiful person I have seen… c’mon I can’t say that… it’s unfair to compare . Let’s keep it simple, she is beautiful.

                              I forced myself to turn away from her, took the headphones, by then someone was beside me and asked, someone coming? I turned, didnt expect her to be asking the seat next to me, with all the happiness said no. I have started playing the song, but all my attention was with her. Strangely, time flew and 30 mins journey seemed few mins, she got down one stop before mine. Even then thoughts about her were lingering around in my mind. As I was about to get down, noticed she left her umbrella, smile came to me naturally, took the umbrella got down. While walking towards the office, decided I will hand it over the next day, the mere thought of going to meet her again pushed the day for me, not sure why I was so excited, fine, fine…. no showoff from me, after all its that age you see…

                              Next day, I got ready some good few mins earlier, reached the stop, took the same bus, as the third stop arrived, for first time over the years, I experienced a very strange feeling. Probably anxiety? Anyways noticed that she wasnt there in the stop, I got down and decided to wait. Finally she showed up, I have planned so much so far, it was a pity I didnt have courage to go tell her that this is her umbrella, I was looking at the road, people passing by,buses etc.., then will glance at her as well. She didnt seem to bother much about the people around, not surprising to me as she would be used to stares and glares than she looking at the strangers. After few mins and buses past by, the number of people in the stop were reduced to very few, I gathered all my courage walked towards her and said, “Hi, dont know if you remember me, but we travelled in the same bus yesterday and you have left your umbrella” , said all this without any break. She looked at me and the umbrella, Thanks and took it as I handed it over, ofcourse, with a smile . I wanted to ask many things, but then I didnt want to spoil things, I walked back and started looking for the bus and controlled my desire to look at her. I knew she will also be coming in the same bus. Bus came. We ended up sitting together again, dont ask me how , just imagine yourself.

                             Instead of hooking myself to the music, I turned towards her, what you thought when you realised that you  lost your umbrella yesterday, I know… bad start… but ppl… its all to do with nervousness… infact reply didnt indicate any disapproval to the question from her side.”I never thought I would get it back, Thanks once again”.She said.”Hey not a problem”. So, you work? Or study? I asked, I was more than happy to continue the conversation. No, searching for one, came a week back and currently going to a training institute, she explained. That also clarified why I havent seen her all these days in this route. Engineering? I asked,”Yes” she said. If it’s ok, can you send me your profile? There are some recruitments going on in my company, I said. She seemed hesitant, but said ok. There started a fairytale.

                             As the days went by, not only we started travelling together but it extended to calls as well. Dont exactly remember how long, but for sure I had time of my life. Days became weeks, weeks into months, and it’s almost a year now. We have become more closer, it’s a feeling of having someone whom you could blindly trust, It was then one day, when I met her, in middle of a conversation I asked, You know what?, what? she queried, Most often in our lives, most beautiful moments are the ones which we lived past, rarely do we experience such a vibrance while we live through the present, I realized one such experience, it was stunningly beautiful,I stopped, she was looking at me wide eyed,and all because of you, I completed. I was very happy I said that, I said it with such affection that it filled my heart, but never thought it would only shortlive. She looked at me still, and then said, I have to tell you something… I become nervous for some strange reason, this is because of the growing sense within me that I like her more and more,I couldnt wait to hear next, my parents have finalised an alliance for me, she said with soft tone looking at the ground, whole world around me went into mute, I knew at some point all these joyous would halt, what I never thought was that it would happen so sudden. Congratulations, I tried hiding my tears, only when she told me that she is going to be married, it striked me how much I loved her,my time has aready past, I was not able to speak anymore, she looked at me and noticed the tears, but she didnt seem bothered, you will not ask me who is the person?, this made me think, for now I was sure she never had any kind of feeling towards me unlike what I had for her, she has considered me only a good friend, it thrashed my heart, I was not able to digest that nothing was there in her mind about me.

                             I somehow managed to regroup, I didnt want her to know I was having such a thing in my mind. So, how it happened, what is he? I enquired with painful heart. Hmm… to be honest, I chose the guy and my parents accepted, she said, as I was thinking the worst was over, this hurted me to the extent I never experienced in my life, all these days whatever she spoke with me and closeness she shared is not special? There is someone else in her life more important than me? that mere thought killed me, I wasnt able to believe what she just said, I thought I knew everything about her, ah… whats happening to me, overwhelming emotions seeming to take control of me, she continued, it was an exhilarating experience, a sense of strength knowing him by my side, even when whole world turn against me, I know at the end of the day, a call from him would turn it on it heads. Its difficult to pick one special moment throughout, a little chat to subtle misunderstanding, all of them seems special. We don’t have anything in common… we don’t listen to each other, don’t know if that was the one created the affection between us, whatever it is,for sure, I knew one thing, most often in our lives, most beautiful moments are the ones which we lived past, rarely do we experience such a vibrance while we live through the present moment, I realized one such experience, it was stunningly beautiful, she stopped and looked at my eyes, all this while I was looking at the ground allowing the tears to flow down, after what she spoke at the end, I looked up, she was looking at me, and you know its all because of you, she completed. I realised Im the one whom she had chosen, mixed emotions went through me, didnt know what to do,I was lost for words,nor did I want to say something, I put my arms wide, she came in, hugged her, spurt of tears flowed from my eyes.

                            Once everything settled down, I asked her, why was she so cruel in explaining about her marriage part, she said, well, I havent been as cruel as you have been without telling what you have felt for me, do you know how much pain I have gone through? , there was a momentary silence, I looked into her eyes and said “I love you”, I didnt want to say anything else.She smiled, so am I now as I take over from our guy. I have been thinking of writing one such for some time now, finally could pen down, by the way, all characters and events in this post are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons or real events is purely coincidental

Signs – Its everywhere

March 12, 2009

 

          Looking at the closed doors of the ironing shop brought a sense of disappointment. I was puzzled naturally as it was just few minutes back I drove that way to my home. I was puzzled for the mere reason on how/why I didn’t notice that the shop has been closed that too a corner shop. Had I noticed, it would have saved me some energy in rather an unsual hot evening. I had clothes in my hand which were lying for weeks in the bureau since they went through washing, one or the other way I have successfully found reasons so far to postpone this walk to the iron shop. It was obvious that closed shop brought a dull feeling, I looked at the shop for few more seconds, turned back started the walk towards home. As I walked for few steps, again the same question creeped in on why I didn’t notice that the shop was closed, it was not as if I was buried into my own thoughts while I drove that evening, hmm… I thought, what could be the reason for this? Probably some questions don’t have answers?

 

          Exactly a fornight ago, March 1, 2009, I was in my native for a function. It was a Sunday and my relatives and few friends joined us, one of my uncles told me he is planning to go to a temple in Thirunageswaram a place nearby to my native Kumbakonam that evening for abhishekam (general term usually referred to the ritual where milk, rosewater etc… are poured over the idols, its symbol of holiness,it’s a believed to be very special/auspicious and supposedly bring prosperity/well being), I was naturally very happy and immediately expressed my desire to join him, when he said he is planning to start by 3, I didn’t enquire much and said ok.

 

          It was around 3, I got a call from my friend who has picked another friend of mine from the busstand, the other fellow has travelled just to be part of the function, back of my mind I remembered about the timing I confirmed to my uncle, I wasn’t too driven by time this time as I know temples in my part of the native opens by 3 pm after the afternoon closure and would be open late in the evening. I asked my uncle if it’s ok if we can start in 15-20 minutes as it would take that much time for my friends to come, my plan was to invite them, spend some time and leave for the temple. Since my friends were known to my family for longtime it wouldn’t be any kind of uncomfort feeling for them to stay even if Im not there. All went as planned, ofcourse few extra minutes and finally I excused myself from my friends and asked my uncle to start, I guess it was around 3:35, we started in the bike and as I was about to leave, noticed one more aunt of mine and uncle along with some more relatives were coming in at distance, since I started I didn’t want to getoff and waited for them to walkby, few more minutes passed by and they reached, after exchanging pleasantaries, I told them about the trip and promised to be back in an hour and half, started finally, I was not particularly too critical about the time we have lost all the while as for me in my mind the temple would be open till late evening, which later proved how illogical it would be to assume on things and repent on the unclarity which results because of that. We started and as planned earlier filled in petrol on the way and when we reached the temple it was around 4:00.

 

          What I found at temple kind of took me back, my uncle’s plan was to do abhishekam for the God-Raaghu/Kethu, significance was that the abhishekam happens exactly on the time called as Rahukaalam (Time which is not considered auspicious in Hindu tradition for any new things, example, someone who is going to start the travel will not start in that time). Every day rahukaalam comes for one and half hours, but different times in different day during the week as per Hindu calendar (Example one day it comes on morning 7:30 to 9:00 and some other day between 12 and 1:30 in the afternoon, but every weekday has its own fixed one and half hours slot which keeps repeating everyweek). In Thirunaageswaram the speciality itself is that this abhishekam happens exactly on that time and people from various parts come and pray for their wellness. Being Sunday, the rahukaalam is between 4:30 and 6:00 in the evening, the information about this auspiciousity of the abhishekam I came to know only when I reached the temple, as I noticed, there was a huge queue already, and my uncle told me that usually people come early and stand in the line so that they get the darshan before the rahukaalam time (before 6 pm). Not even in my thoughts was I expecting this, I was only expecting it to be normal abhishekam and time wouldn’t be a problem, but it wasn’t to be, we took the tickets and joined the queue, my uncle was telling me about the tradition there in the temple and he hoped that we will get the darshan in one and half hours, that’s about 5:30-5:40, that comforted me as otherwise I would feel guilty that I was the one responsible for us missing the abhishekham before 6.

         

The first 30 mins was hardly any movement in the queue as the abhishekham itself starts only at 4:30. We were talking and catching with whats happening in each other lives, we have almost touched all the topics and on top of it all, in my mind was the distance we need to cover to reach the place where abhishekam happens, with my prior trips here I know it is quite far and I wasn’t sure if we would make it. As the time flown by, with very little movement coupled with not knowing where the queue would end up it resulted in bit of nervousness, but for some reason it never bothered us or rather we didn’t take it very seriously, it was around 5:25 when there was flurry of movement and we were happy that we reached the final turn, we needed to just take one turn and that would lead us to the prayer hall, as we were about to walk more freely, gates were closed as they already allowed enough of people to pass in by in the previous batch, that means we need to wait till they open again for the next batch, we were hopeful and was more or less confident that they would open for one more batch. We were in front with couple of more people when the gates were closed hence we were somehow calm that we would get a chance to get a glimpse, but what god gave us was more than what we even would have dreamed off. We didn’t notice exactly how much time we would have stood there, we only know it was short, gates opened again.

 

There was a escort in front of us who led us and stopped in the prayer hall few metres behind the previous batch who were sitting and viewing the darshan, the rituals of the previous batch was still on, we noticed the time was 5:45, somehow felt bit relieved, we didn’t know what god has got in store for us that time, we got a glimpse of abhishekham as we were standing at far distance behind the previous batch, once done, the other batch started leaving rather asked to and being the first ones in the next batch we obviously got to the front near the karpagruha (place where they have the god idiolised), as the pooja’s started we realized how lucky we were to be in this batch, since its almost close to 6:00, we were the last batch and hence all the abhishekam and alangaaram (makeup) to the god was done with bit more grandness, even the milk abhishekham which is what my uncle came for, we were previliged to see for good length of time. Neither of us spoke as we lost ourselves in the beauty of what is happening in front of us and it was evident with the goosepimples I got with what I saw, it was some sight to watch the rituals, such a heart warming thing. It was close to 30 mins and probably the longest of all the pooja’s they have done since 4:30 pm that day.

 

          The awe of having witnessed such a pooja from such close vicinity didnt sink in even after long time, myself and my uncle discussed how significant it was to miss the previous batch, had we got into the previous batch we would not have witnessed what we saw, we probably would have been at far distance and would have to be contended with only the glimpse, we acknowledged  that the best thing was to miss the previous batch which happened in front of us, we were separated by seconds, well it striked me then, had we came to the temple few mins earlier also we would not have received this darshan, one and half hours before what seemed a problem turned out to be the best thing to have happened, it was no more a guilty feeling, rather I was thankful to my aunt and uncle who came in as we were about to start from home and the time we spent talking to them proved to be decisive, sounds like F1 race isn’t it. well its that close, still to think of it, its not only the last minute entry of my uncle and aunt, its also about my friends coming in at that exact time….., it looked to me like a perfect script tailor made which nobody could planned any better, those things leaves an amazing feeling which would leave us stunned.  Ever since that experience my earlier belief of  “Things happens for a reason and for the good” has gained a huge boost, I don’t know how many friends I would have told since then, but everytime I tell them it’s a feeling of utmost satisfaction.

 

          Well, with all that, today more than the disappointment of the shop being closed, I was more oriented in thinking on why I missed the shop while I drove that way few mins back, I would have walked few metres and in front was a couple who were walking from the other side towards my direction and the guy was looking at me and the dresses I was holding in my hand, it was very momentary and nothing was in my mind, I was probably thinking he wanted to ask if the shop is closed, I presumed that they are going to give some clothes to the same shop for ironing as well, then I noticed his wife looking at the clothes I was holding and asking if I want to iron them, taken aback a bit, I realized in few seconds she is the one who does the ironing in that shop which is right now closed and I failed to recoginise her all this while, confirming, I handed over the clothes and walked home not only with the lightened hand but also with the lightened heart which seemed to have got the mysteries answered from god, its because I didn’t notice the closed shop while I drove that I actually made attempt to go to the shop and ended meeting the person who were coming back from some function. Signs are obviously everywhere to guide us through good and bad times and its only us fail to read them for a better life, Im yet to get over these experiences, well, life is indeed beautiful with all these stunningly beautiful moments.

A pleasant reminder of a beautiful memory

Ironic it may sound, a particular type of punishment in class usually sends nervous vibes, come to think of it, it should not have, but then it’s always scary when the teacher mentions the punishment as, the guy should go and sit next a girl, well sounds funny now, but it didn’t that time. Right from those days, we have distanced ourselves from girls, rather indirectly been drove that way, no wonder in that case, talking to a girl would raise eyebrows, need not to mention the nervousness inside which always tells the girl will go and complain to the principal. For us, we know only that they exist in our class and nothing more than that.

Knowing our freedom is one ring away, it’s always a nice feeling when the last period starts. As the bell rang, myself and Karthik rushed to the ground to start the evening games, usually it’s not preplanned, its more to do with availability of any game for play than to do with the interest, whatever it is, we enjoy it. Karthik stays near to my house and hence we make it a point to cycle together everyday. As usual, we played for a while and decided its time to start. We avoid main road as the traffic would be more, we talk a lot during we cycle, and its always fun. It isn’t any different this time also. From the main road we need to take a right turn in order enter the less crowded lane which we usually prefer, we decided to stick to the same route and as we approached the turn, I didn’t know whats going to happen in next few metres.

As we took the turn, I noticed a girl walking on the right side of that broad road and she figured to me as very familiar, I immediately know who the girl is, I wanted to confirm it with Karthik who is cycling to my left, and she is still in front of us, with the kind of alienated relationship we have with girls, I didn’t want to confirm anything with Karthik till we distance ourselves from her. In the next few seconds we pedaled past her, I turned a little to my right and ensured we are well ahead of her, immediately I turned to Karthik and in a kind of high voice asked him, doesn’t she look like Chethana? Even before I could complete my query I could see a girl turning her face from the left side of the road towards us, there she is, real Chethana. Silence, whole world seemed to suddenly start practicing yoga, such a silence, I didn’t know what to do, she looked at us for a brief moment as we passed her, my heartbeat raised exponentially, all this while, myself and Karthik had so much of chatter, the next few minutes we had so called uneasy calm, he broke the silence, “I was praying that you shouldn’t ask anything and that’s exactly what you did!!!”, Will it result in anyproblem? I asked. She is going to complain tomorrow and because of you Im also going to get suspended, he sounded very nervous when he said that. Karthik is a very strong character, hearing him say something like that is the last thing I wanted that time, there were butterflies all over my stomach, how am I going to manage this tomorrow. Only I know that I didn’t mean any harm and did my best to delay my enquiry so that we move past her, When I asked my query to Karthik, I hadn’t noticed a girl walking on the left and to my luck she happened to be the real one. I explained all this to Karthik, he was really upset, “You couldn’t keep your mouth shut? You could have asked me once we reached home, he completed, as we headed towards my home.

Anybody who would have looked at me that time would have known something has happened, no wonder my Mom asked me immediately, with all the seriousness in the world I explained her and sitting beside me was Karthik who was making comments about the situations I was explaining, hearing all that, I was expecting my mom to become serious as well, to my surprise she started laughing, If you are that afraid who asked you to talk about a girl she asked, I didn’t know what to say, but at least I felt better with that casual approach. I decided that day, never again I would do something like that…, my memory stopped there, I couldn’t recollect what happened next day at school, natural it is to forget what has happened 14 years ago, all this came to my mind when I was looking at a Maha lacto booklet I received as a compliment for collecting Maha lacto chocolate covers and sending it.This happened during my last trip to the native, I was digging out old stuffs and with that came to my mind this unforgettable experience, whenever I think of that incident, it puts on a smile to my face and so to my mom who still remembers the incident as fresh as I do… a treasured memory indeed to remind of those beautiful times

Messenger of God

August 31, 2008, Train was on time that Sunday, Mysore – Mayiladuthurai express, which starts from Mayiladuthurai which is 40 Kms from my hometown Kumbakonam, comes to Kumbakonam at 6:05 PM, from my place, it goes via Thanjavur, Tiruchy, Karur, Salem, Bangalore and finally reaches Mysore. Usually whenever I return from my native, I ask my mom not to prepare any food for my dinner as I would buy some food in Tiruchy station where train stops for about 30 mins. During the last two visits, I asked my mom to prepare since they have changed the platform in Tiruchy and to get the food I used to eat, I need to walk a lot. I was well on time, this time it was a hectic trip as I had to run around the place from morning to evening to get things done. On top of it, that Saturday night I didn’t sleep well. Throughout Sunday I never had a chance to lie down for a moment. This was one reason I was looking forward to Train journey, I know I can take complete rest. Train arrived on time – 6:05 PM and for me it was business as usual, I decided before Tiruchy station, I will finish my dinner which I was having as a separate parcel, so that I need not to search for a proper place to eat since most passengers’ board in Tiruchy. Another reason to finish my dinner early by 8:00 is to have hot milk from the platform vendors, it was one of those nice things.., well as train started moving, I relaxed and was waiting for train to reach the outskirts of Tiruchy, I didn’t know or didn’t even had the clue of what was waiting for me in Tiruchy.

 

As the train started moving, I was playing games in mobile which usually is kind of the timepass I do if I don’t carry any book. I was not playing well, I attributed it to the fact that it was moving train, also just before reaching Thanjavur which is again 40 Kms from Kumbakonam,my native, I was feeling bit of uncomfortness in my head. When I boarded the train, no one was there in my compartment, when we reached Thanjavur, a family of three (husband, wife and a kid) and two other guys boarded the same compartment, as the family conversed I understood that they are not going to be in the compartment for long, train started for Thanjavur station 5 mins late that day due to crossing, as the train started, feeling of nausea was slowly but surely started creeping in. I was not really pertuberated at the start, but 20 mins into the journey since Thanjavur, I know it wasn’t the usual feeling, I was falling sick and I was falling sick quiet fast. It was 7:50 PM when I decided I would take my dinner and the tablets (Crocin and Digene) which I carry and then sleep off quickly. At that point, I could barely feel comfortable, giddiness started and I had to look down to be able to feel ok. With difficulty I opened my food parcel, for the next 5 minutes I hadn’t done anything but staring at the chapathi’s. I was not feeling a bit to eat; I know at that point how serious my health has deteriorated. He, the head of that family asked me if I am not well, I told him I am feeling giddiness and sense of nausea. He asked his wife if she has tablets, he asked me not to eat the food which I was carrying, rather advised me to take idly’s once train reaches tiruchy. With the state I was in, walking a few meters itself was looking herculean task, I know going and taking food from platform is out of the window, I forced myself,ate a chappathi and chucked the remaining, his wife told that she doesn’t have the tablet which she usually carry, I was cursing my luck, I called my cousin who is a doctor and got the tablet names, I asked another guy in my compartment if he could buy the tablet for me in Tiruchy station, I was anxious because being in that state is horrible, I cannot look up, I cannot turn my head fast, there seem to be whole lot of weight on my head, I was totally lost to say the least. He told me that he is a frequent traveler by this route and there is no medical shop in Tiruchy railway station and one has to go to bus-stand to buy the tablets, He, the father, who was trying to help me also acknowledged the same.

 

Each passing minute worsened my condition, he asked me to take the tablets I have and go to sleep, I asked one fellow passenger to give me the window seat so that I can vomit incase if I need to, I sat and laid my head down with the support of the window rails, 5 more mins passed by, I started feeling from stomach some kind of trigger which would eventually go uptill my head, I know I have ran into total nausea. I asked my fellow person to pass the bag, I couldn’t even go and take it, it was that bad, opened the bag with great difficulty and found Crocin and Digene, by then train had reached Trichy, it was 8:10. The family who boarded on Thanjavur was getting down, he came to me and asked me to take care, advised me to sleep immediately. I know he cared for me, unfortunate his wife didn’t have the tablets that day. It was when I realized how divine the medicine field is. Something told me, if I vomit I would feel better, I gathered all my strength and walked to the side door which is opposite to the platform, I sat down with the water bottle. I guess I was sitting there for 10 mins, I was sweating which told me I am not running fever, but the giddiness was not leaving me, I know sitting there wouldn’t help, I went back to the seat and was back to the position of laying my head down on the window rails. I was also thinking should I get down and go back to my hometown, it sounded very illogical since I couldn’t walk even, I know the only way I can manage is by staying on the train. For each action I need to do, I need to regroup all my strength, I was left surprised how weak this last one hour has made me, I once again with all difficulty opened the crocin tablet and was holding it as I was not feeling like doing anything but to stay still. I know Crocin would not help as I am going through giddiness and the tablet is for fever, it was a state of desperation and I wanted to take some tablet which would give me relief from that painful state. It was about 20 mins since the train has arrived and in another few mins it would leave Tiruchy.

 

“Take this”, I heard the voice and saw a hand holding 2 tablets. It was a moment of joy I cannot explain in words, with difficulty I looked up and found that hand to be the person who left 20 mins earlier with his family. He advised to take one at that point and take one in the morning, I took the tablets on my hand and looked at it as the treasured magical possession, I took the tablet immediately without any questions, I desperately wanted to get better. I had to look down if I need to feel better; I cannot look normally that’s the magnitude of giddiness I was going through. I wanted his number so that I can call him later, but the only words coming out of my mouth were Nandri- (“Thanks”), as I took the tablet he touched my head softly and said, you will be better in next 30 mins, as I said thanks, he said no problem, and walked away., I couldn’t even turn my head and see himoff, within next few minutes I vomited a lot and then came the relief I was looking for, I lied down immediately with the support of my bag, I closed my eyes, in the last hour I was closing my eyes most times, but this time, it was a different feeling, a sense of happiness, a sense which told me I am out of the worst part. Had that not been for that unknown man I don’t know what would have happened, he doesn’t know me, he has taken all the pain to get that tablet for me. He looked to me as the messenger of god. I was touched, in a world when people just stare when accident happen and pass by, his act of kindness is incomparable, I am thankful to someone whom I don’t know. I felt bad that I didn’t collect his contact details, hopefully I would meet him in one of my future journey’s, but I know it wouldn’t have mattered to him, he didn’t leave any clue, what he left with me was the two tablets, a heartful of most pleasantful/thankful experience and more reasons to look forward to the mystery called “Life”

 

PS: It took me couple of more days before I could get back to normalcy; Nausea was due to lack of sleep and more of tiredness.

A Truly Sporting Experience…

Though it is true that only the real quality can sustain for long, the first impression is the one which invariably creates interest.It was the same thing in 1992 when I first watched Tennis match. It happened to be one of those epic matches. I got introduced to Tennis and more importantly to “Goran Ivanisevic”, the tall Croatian who has the ability to serve aces at will. As my father told about him and his ability, I was naturally thrilled. The first match which I’m talking about is Wimbledon final in year 1992 between two people trying to win their first Grandslam, Agassi and Ivanisevic; it was start of an interesting phase in Tennis history. I remember the match well more because of one game, where Ivanisevic served 4 aces on the trot to win a game, which when showed in highlights was edited so nicely that you tend to feel you are watching a movie. Unlike traditional tennis, Goran plays tennis in fast forward mode, it’s simply action. No wonder I become ardent follower of tennis. The period between 1992 and 1998 was when I started following tennis closely. It was in that period I found out that its rivalry which makes tennis more interesting. When people used to talk about Sampras and Agassi, I was in my own world cherishing the aces of Ivanisevic, honestly he did not do badly, it was just not the right time to be in professional tennis especially with the likes of Sampras and Agassi in their prime form. In all of the 3 finals he made it to Wimbledon till 1998, he lost twice to Sampras and once to Agassi. In between he was ranked as high as number 2.

He was always unpredictable, you cannot possibly say he would win, on his day he is one of those players whom you don’t like to play against. I don’t remember how I followed Tennis after 1998 when I moved to hostel for my engineering, but I remember 2001 Wimbledon, its one of these inevitable things which eventually had to happen. As someone who reached Semifinals twice and finals thrice since 1990, he was considered one of the unlucky person who seem to have missed taking home the crown, every passionate fan of Tennis wanted him to win one. 1998 when he lost the final third time in Wimbledon, second time to Sampras, it seemed to done with the chase for a coveted Wimbledon glory. By 2001, he slipped to rank number 125 from rank 12 in 1998 year end; one can imagine his form slump. Though everyone wanted him to win Wimbledon, hardly anyone would have predicted what happened in Wimbledon, England 2001. It was a script no one would have possibly thought of.

Wimbledon is not the only tournament which happens in Tennis, it is one of the 4 tournaments which together termed as “Grand Slam Events”. Wimbledon happens during July, the other 3 events, Australian open in January, French open in May/June, and US open in August are considered very presitigious. As in every other sport, unless you are top ranked player, you are not going to be an automatic choice. It was a pity that 3 time finalist in Wimbledon was no more an automatic choice, thankfully, given his performance in grass court of Wimbledon decided to give him wild card entry where one need not to play qualifying matches.It was just the right kind of start Ivanisevic would have hoped, from nowhere people saw what this tall lean fellow can do. They saw a different ivanisevic which they have never seen before. He met Patrick Rafter, a specialist in Grass court. The moment Ivanisevic reached Quarter finals, it was one of those rare occasions where tennis fans all across wanted him to win even though they were supporting their own idols; it was obvious when he entered the court for the finals. It was all about him; even now in my mind I could feel the emotion of such a day. It was also the day when sport saluted one of its heroes. The finals by no means was one sided, when the match got over in 3 hours and 1 minute, Ivanisevic has created more than one history, the lowest ranked player and the first wild card entry to win Wimbledon. This Success of his was considered to be number 16 in 100 Greatest Sporting Moments.

Year 2001 Wimbledon was more eventful for one more reason. It came to light only years later. All this while as I talked about Ivanisevic, it was one man who in all those years stood tall, winning one grand slam after other and made them looked easy; He was no doubt the best in his era. When the Wimbledon happened in 2001, barring 1996, Sampras has won Wimbledon titles all the way from 1993, making it 7 titles. He entered 2001 event hoping to make it 5 in a row, he was stopped in fourth round. That match went on for five sets. The match now considered being the only one of its kind for the reason one legend met the one in the making that time. As I see it now, there would not have been a better person to have stopped Sampras, though I would have loved Sampras to have emulated the feet of 5 in a row set by Bjorn Borg. Sampras eventually won one more Grandslam the next year (US open) and retired, he won 14 of them in all which is a record till this point of time. It was considered at that time probably no one would ever come close to the record set by him. Nobody thought the person who has beaten him in 2001 Wimbledon fourth round would eventually go on to win titles in a heap and would come close to the record of 14 Grand slam titles. I am talking none other than the maestro Roger Federer.Roger Federer has grown in stature since then, so much so, that in one of the interviews he said, “I surprise myself sometimes” which has become one of my very favourite lines as there is so much of truth in it.

Federer is all class, sometimes I wonder if the players playing opposite to him play only to bring out a shot which would mesmerize people watching. He goes about his job in a much subdued fashion, no emotions shown, his humbleness is something which speaks for itself, and this was showcased when during his speech on court after winning Wimbledon 2007. He said, “Rafael plays well, I better win as many as I can before he starts winning”. As I am writing this, Fedex express has conquered 12 titles in all already, he has put himself in line for the 13^th title tomorrow as he faces Rafael Nadal to chase one of the titles he would badly want to have in his kitty. Just like Sampras, Federer has never won a French open crown. More than his 13^th Grand Slam, what he would be looking at I think is his first French open crown. He knows this is the best chance to get this done with the eluding title as there is Novak Djokovic who will be more sharper whom he has to content with next year. Ofcourse, on tomorrow he has to content with the God on clay, Rafael Nadal. This is the fourth time they will be meeting in French open, last two times in final and one before that in semifinal, Nadal came out winning. It sure going to be a interesting contest.

If watching tennis is one of those nice things to do, talking about the intricacies of the game with somebody who enjoys it as much as you do is something which is even better, its even more interesting when you back two different players. That exactly what happened two years back around the same time of the year, when I and one more friend of mine were started talking about French open, we ended up taking different sides, myself Nadal and my friend taking Federer side, ofcourse the prize is a treat., since then we always have had such interesting contests and some treat pending from my side till now , though I didn’t had a chance to discuss about this French open, I know there is one person out there who would be really wanting Federer to come out in flying colours. As usual I take Nadal’s side .., let’s see. Irrespective of the outcome of the tomorrow’s match, one thing is for sure, with Federer, Nadal and Djokovic, Tennis is going to be hotter and reach even more heights, and this awesome threesome is going to rule Tennis for years to come.

Time to re-write

Right from the graduation till finding a job, always has wondered if there would be a job. While searching, getting a call itself for test/interview used to be a big deal, the statements from experts saying India would be in shortage of manpower by 2010 would seem to be a joke,especially whenever there used to be weeks together without any prospective advertisements for job openings in newspaper. It was that adverse that has taught the value of what it means to be working. Finally after getting the breakthrough, all the frustrations got translated into good work. The passion the joblessness has created was amazing and unmatched.                  

                             As I write this on a Sunday evening, in my thoughts was a program in Discovery channel about world atlas, in which they take up a country and explain its history and heritages. Today by chance I happen to notice that the program is going to be about China, decided to watch it, later felt glad I made that choice. As the documentary rolled on, it was heart warming to see how much they cherish the traditions, how much they preserve the thousand years of great history.It is amazing how a county, which is bigger than India and potentially projected as the next economic super power in 20-30 years span thrive on the traditions and able to pull off seemingly impossible tasks. Some of the portions of the documentary captured the essence of the basic life across rural China, not surprisingly they are similar to us. The difference though seemingly is evident in urban places. I heard it from one of my friends who told me how unemployment has been handled there. I was amazed and it left a scary thought as well.          

                             If not having a job is painful, it is even more painful to know that there is anything coming up in the near future. The insecure feeling how we are going to prosper in life seems to loom larger as the day progresses. It was that particular phase which makes people stronger. It instills a sense of pride and we know after those moments we can achieve greater things in life.The determination goes up, the sense of purpose and value of being valued join hands and brings out the best in us. Imagine how it changes our lives, it need not to be the instance which was explained, it could any kind of adversness. Each one of us at one point has come out bravely facing the storm. Think of how it has changed our lives, how much impact it has left in us and our surroundings.          

                              Even for a single person if it makes so much of difference, imagine the effect it would create when a whole nation is knitted with such effort. Yes, it’s happening and it’s right now happening in the country with the largest population. The dedication and the sincere approach potrayed by them are inspiring. The 2 hour program showed the glimpse of great nation in the making.The only question it left me with, are we on???? 

                              We have read history with awe about Japan’s rise after Second World War, these moments we live now are going to be history one day, we are in the culmination of all, and luckily we have a chance to re-write some of them, a history which when our next generation reads would be very proud of.

Waiting – Cherished Memories

Can waiting be ever pleasant? Given a 3 minute signal gets onto us. I guess it is not a fair comparison in this context. Waiting in anycase is painful. Anxiousness, depression, anger… waiting causes them all at a go. It is not exciting.       

    I think  I was 10 years old, when my first train journey happened, atleast the one I remember. I could still recollect the build up to it. Quite honestly, do not remember how this world of trains striked such a beautiful picture in my mind. It was a world I wanted to live in, a world I wanted to enjoy. That kind of interest during those times, if I analyse now, would probably because I never got a chance to travel. 

          Forget about traveling, the mere railway crossing during my bus journey itself instills so much of excitement in me, I used to wonder how it feels if I could travel by the train at that time. A look at the tracks while crossing them used to be enough for me to mull about it to my parents about my desire of traveling by train. Its not the end, I would continue asking them where the track starts?, where it goes?, where it will end?. Questionsssssss. That was the kind of interest I had. It is still fresh in my memory of those times when I have actually tried telling my mother to plan the bus journey in accordance with the railway crossing; hmm it was one of those wonderful things .

          I was traveling to my uncle’s town around 7:30 in the evening by bus. We encountered railway crossing, it was a feeling of hitting a jackpot, the gates are closed. It was the happiest moment for me. First victory when my mother allowed me and brother to get down the bus and watch. The buses standing in line from the gate with the headlights switched off, that itself was a enjoyable scene for me. Which way the train is coming? What is the name of the train? What speed it will come.Questionssssss Questionssss. I would presume train was coming, whenever there was a Dim yellow light at a distance in either side of the tracks. Immediatley would tell my brother about it gleefully. Finally after few misses, it used to happen. A monstrous honk and there I used to witness a creature approach fast and zip past us. It was a breathtaking sight in itself. This is enough to tell all my friends next day about the luxury of seeing the fastest moving thing in earth. Give them example on how I tried to count the number of bogies and failed, that’s how fast it was .     

      I was thrilled when I came to know from my uncle that railway track passes only few metres away, from his house’s backyard. The problem ofcourse used to be the compound wall which blocks the view. I was very sad until I saw the relatively big washing stone. I knew,if I climb on it, it would just be enough to get a glimpse across the field, it was a feeling of achievement, a feeling of unearthed a great treasure. I don’t remember on how many times I would have ran from the front hall or even from street to the backyard,the moment I heard the honk.   

        When a glimpse would mean so much, no wonder I was on top of the world when I was told I would travel to my grandfather’s town by train. It was a dream came true. I felt I was elevated to the status of those elite people who have traveled already. The count down began, every morning I would feel happy as it was one day less before my first journey. On the day of travel, it was a feeling as if the whole world was going to travel on the train. I didn’t want to miss out a place on the train. I expressed this concern and urged everyone to start early. Even the auto journey to the railway station, I enjoyed better than ever before. I was praying when my father was on the queue to get the tickets. I didn’t want them to say no to my tickets, I didn’t know that wouldn’t happen. It was the first victory, the tickets. I look at them as prized possession, a magical wand. As I entered the platform, it was a moment of pride. The vendors, people, Rickshaw’s, Auto’s all were same as before, but they looked different, I felt it looked a different world to me, the world I wanted to belong to. As we walked and sat in a bench under a banyan tree, I was amazed. With calmness all around, I heard those birds sing, make noises.It filled my heart, and they were my friends since then. The thrill I experienced waiting for the train, it was never the same compared to other things I used to wait for. It was the impression which never changed since then.  

        Even if train is late, just being in the platform itself is an experience. The enjoyment it brings is something which cannot be matched. It is one of those places which doesn’t make me feel out of place, looking at the people who have come for sendoff’s, well those sendoff memories require another episode. Travelling by train is a feeling at home, especially those short 10 or 12 hour journeys.   

        I probably have to re-visit the first paragraph, with the kind of experience’s, I think there has to be exceptions as usual; waiting in this case is indeed a pleasant thing. As I just look at the platform through my train’s window, I could see people hurrying through, vendors busy selling their goods. Families, friends standing by side of their beloved one’s trying to make up for the things they have missed to discuss all this while. Hmm… it’s a beautiful world. It’s a crush I have never got full off. Don’t think ever will. As the train starts slowly, a sense of happiness fills my heart. Yes its real and I am living in this beautiful world.

                       

 * Written during the return journey from Kumbakonam to Bangalore – 3rd Feb 2008

A Refreshing Experience Everytime

         I dont know where to start. When you feel there is so much to write about something, I guess this is how it feels invariably everytime. Each passing minute touches us in a profound way, some of them very visible, some of them more subtle. Its difficult really to get back those minutes, ofcourse as life always has, there are exceptions to this case.     

       Right through my schooling, always had felt a connection, which later has grown so much so it became a part of me. It had answers to whatever emotions the mind has to throw. The mere presence would always bring down the restlessness, anxiousness or any uncertainities, you name it.     

      It brings to me those beautiful moments where my heart was filled with the most peaceful thoughts.While I stayed at hostel during my college days,the companionship I enjoyed because of it was wonderful.Even now,When I look back at those nights I spent with it looking at the vacant ground in front of my hostel, it was a feeling of completeness, a sense of joy which cannot be put to words, the inner peace it generates usually is unmatched.  

         Its a relationship which I never noticed until last few years. One of the most pleasantful thing I could think is when it is with me during driving. If dancing in rain is one of the happiest thing humans know, this is no lesser, at some point of our lives we all would agree. The driving becomes so less stressful in traffic. World looks even more beautiful while cruising through the scenic places.It makes you feel what you would not have felt before. With it, traffic doesnt affect us, it makes us live in a plane above all those in front of your eyes.If you havent experienced it, I suggest you strongly to try this. 

          I dont know how to end, when you feel there is so much to write about something and you havent captured them all, I guess this is how it feels when you know that you need put a full stop somewhere, hmm., irrespective of any language it is, the above said experiences are common., yes life always has such exceptions which can be lived time and again. Doesn’t it sound Music to the ears?

பொன்னியின் செல்வன் (Ponniyin Selvan) – Heart warming experience

At the end one thing is sure, I have lived with them. It’s more real than what these words could possibly convey. I understood, irrespective of how many times I read it, it will always remain to be a beautiful journey through the history. A journey I can take anytime without any second thought.           

                           Ponniyin Selvan is a real epic about political crisis which prevailed in Chola kingdom prior to Raja Raja Chola period, during which the famous “Brahadeeswara” temple in Thanjavur was built. Written by Kalki in 1950’s, the story details about the experiences of a young soldier during the time when political uncertainities even threatened to derail the entire Chola dynasty. “Ponni” is the other name of the river “Cauvery”, “Selvan” means the son, Raja Raja Chola was being referred as “Ponniyin Selvan”. Though the theme of the book revolves around Raja Raja Chola, the main hero remains “Vanthiyathevan”, through whom author tells us the tale, a young soldier I referred to earlier.       

                           Writing is an art; it was what I thought till I read this epic story, when I finished reading the 5^th and the final volume, the opinion was changed already. It’s a magic. Till now, I don’t have a count on how many times I have read this beautiful work, but I remember how I felt every single time. The mere reading always has brought to me the elating experience which I simply cannot put into words. Every now and then things which happen in day-to-day life affects us in one or the other way, we live some of those moments, we feel some of those moments, we see some of the moments and those moments make our lives. Given all that we always have something left in us not lived or not felt or not seen. I was not an exception not until I read this amazing book.   

                          It was my grandma who collected all the episodes from the weekly magazine and bounded them together very professionally as five volumes, this was done over 3 and half years span. For me collecting them itself was a tough task for that long a time, forget about somebody who wrote it actually. The story runs at breath taking pace, just when you go to the brink of excitement and start thinking about what is going to happen next, author diverts you to a completely different situation and makes you forget about the unsaid part earlier, only to remind you later and make you feel the happiness which you would have felt only during the childhood. The details he gives about each scene is mind boggling, I don’t know about how the scripts are made for movies, but this one I must say has all the details one could possibly imagine.                                 

                          The character presentation is trickier, since this was based on real incidents and people, not at one place author has the luxury of potraying the character as he wants, and this makes the work even more majestic. The narration, it is a stunner. You can read it as many number of times as you want it, everytime he will make you look forward to the next episode, you would still ask yourself what is going to happen next. It simply is the testimony to the narration. It has everything, Romance, Friendship, Political drama, Action, Management etc, you name it. Whats so special is simply that you would be part of them. The analysis of each of characters by other characters in their own perspective is something which shows the dynamicity of the author in living each character by himself, for the people like me who reads it, it remains a mystery. More so, when you find your friends wanting their life partners to be having the qualities of some of the characters they come across in this epic story.           

                          The life is filled so much of uncertainities, unwanted worries, it always seems very tough.But whatever be the situation, once I start reading this gift; it liberates me to a paradise, a world which I have never experienced before. A feeling which I never believed could possibly exist. It makes me forget about everything. To put it simple, everytime you will be made to feel you are living a new life. The desires we have are fulfilled through the characters, we would be made happy for ourselves. We celebrate the victories of the characters when they over come a tough challenge. All this was proved possible and all because of the gem of an author. Thanks to him not only for given the world such a work but for having made millions of people who read it live the life they would have loved to. The world he has created and the excitement he instilled can never be taken away. The Yahoo groups, Orkut community, Wiki links etc. are just the living testimonials to this fantabulous work by Kalki. It just inspires to live better. 

                         The characters and the places mentioned in this story are of real and one cannot help but to compare. I hail from Kumbakonam which is nearby to Thanjavur where the story revolves. I remember whenever I pass through the Palaces and the rivers, I start imagining about how it would have been 1000 years back when this story happened.Even yesterday night, one of my friend was mentioning, it would have been better off if we would have lived in such a time. We know it was just out of the love we have found with the characters.

                             

                          At the end one thing is sure I have lived with them. It’s more real than what these words could possibly convey. I understood, irrespective of how many times I read it, it will always remain to be a beautiful journey through the history. A journey I can take anytime without any second thought. 

 

                       

                          To all my friends out there, who can read Tamil, if you haven’t read this book earlier, just try out first few pages, it would be enough for you to get hooked. Why so? That’s what makes it so special. When you do read it, please share with me your experience, I would love to hear those. For all of my friends who cant read Tamil,this has been translated to English and is available, currently I dont have the links or soft copy,will soon update if I succeed in my search.

 

                                           

                                    The details about what exactly this book is about can be found in http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ponniyin_Selvan and http://varnam.org/history/2006/02/book_review_ponniyin_selvan.php

 

 

PS: If you do need the PDF format of Tamil version, let me know, would send it across.

Values

                                    Two and half years back, one fine Saturday morning I boarded the city bus in Domlur to go to Koramangala. It wasn’t rush by the usual standards. Two things, wallet and the mobile should always be given special attention as these are more theft prone. My stop came, I was thinking about my wallet and was about to get down. It struck me; rather my mobile wasn’t there in my pocket. I got frantic. Started searching and it was indeed a big loss. One of the fellow passengers asked me my number and dialed it for me. It was ringing, I know at that moment it wasn’t in the bus, somebody should have flicked it. The wait was over; someone on the other end picked it up. I was glad. Told him what had happened, he asked me to come and collect the mobile. He said he would wait for me in a nearby hotel. Life came to me then, I thanked the fellow person who dialed it for me. Got down, took an auto and rushed to the hotel.           

                                       I was looking for somebody who was waiting for someone. Ironic as it may sound; it wasn’t a pleasant interlude by any stretch of imagination. My heart was racing with anxiety. One face of my mind was trying to calm me down by saying I’m just moments away from re-possessing the mobile. As always, another face though was not presenting a comforting picture. I was busy meanwhile thinking how I should be thanking him for such a favour. It was only a few minutes drive, but appeared to be never ending for me. Finally, I was there. I was looking around, it was a strange feeling, and I kept looking around. The idea of unknown somehow slowly started to fade away, I re-grouped myself, located a one rupee booth, dialed the number. I heard the inevitable. Mobile Switched off. All those moments of me trying to find out a way to thank this someone seemed to be a joke. I walked away with the let down feeling which I cannot put in words. It invoked me a question then.          

                            In the last ten years whenever I go to my native place, it was always a pleasant walk in the morning to the market. The freshness and the liveliness it depicts in the morning always fascinate me. My latest visit, which happened last week to market, once again was no different. As usual, my father asked me to join him to the market. As we reached the market place, we had a look around to decide upon which vendor to buy. We decided to go to a very old woman who was about to finish her day’s business. After we were done with the business, the bill came to Rs.25 as per her rate. We paid the amount and left the place.          

                               We would have walked only few metres, I felt a hand on my shoulder, I turned around and found a man standing. He asked me whether I was the one who purchased vegetables from the old woman. I nodded my head in confirmation and he asked me to follow him without telling me why. I was puzzled but decided to follow him as I felt he meant something. As I walked, I was wondering what this was all about. Have I missed something? Have I paid less? Putting an end to all the questions was the old woman in front of me who was about my grandma’s age. She asked me whether I was the one who bought vegetables from her just now. As I confirmed she handed me a 10 rupee note, as I started concluding that I have paid 35 instead of 25, she explained, whatever you have bought costs only Rs.15, you have instead paid Rs.25. Why I need your money!!! She concluded.  I looked at my father as he tried explaining her that this amount was based on her rate only; she confirmed it is only 15. I took the money, thanked her. I was touched. My father was as startled as me; He turned and said, now that was integrity. I understood immediately what he meant; I felt the question was answered now through this very simple act. Humanity has not died, not just yet.

A Nice Trip

This post is about the trip to Kerala, which our team won in an internal competition….

 

                                      There was a kind of excitement within the team when we came to know about the result. The trip to Kerala was planned so fast that we didn’t even have the time to come to terms with it. The journey was postponed from Friday to Saturday, and we were looking forward to it. We did not sleep soundly as we had  to wake up early in the morning. When we were getting down in Cochin, it was very clear to each one of us that it was going to be a nice trip. The climate was just about right with no rain and sun was not harsh. After reaching Alapuzzha,a two hour drive from Cochin, we could feel the buzz in the air about Boat race, famously called as “Nehru Trophy” boat race being named after Jawaharlal Nehru when he visited the place in 1952.There was a history and it was good to know.We were privileged to see the 55th edition. We are even more lucky as it happens only on the second Saturday of August every year.
                                            

                                  After settling down in our rooms, we started for boat race around 12:00 noon from our resort, which is located in the backwaters. The commutation is through only boats and the feel is different. When we reached the place where the race happens, we could see  thousands of people taking their seats in the make shift arrangement made especially for the boat race. The race is about 1380 metres long and on both sides were people just squeezing in to get a glimpse of this famous festival., yes it was a festival atmosphere.

 

                                       Localites were taking the opportunity to transpire the whole thing to more grandness as this happens once in a year,while the media and others tried their hands on smart marketing by plying the boats across the place with the hoardings of their products. Presence of news channels and local media means there isn’t any stone left unturned for coverage. There was  live commentary been given in the public address system(mostly in Malayalam,sometimes in English and Hindi). Whenever the commentators sing famous Kerala boat songs, the crowd breaks into huge cheer,singing and complimenting them with each line. This means the people outside Kerala like us were involved and more interestingly,hundreds of foreigners who have come to witness this snake boat race were kind of sucked into this vortex of activity. There were locales trying to teach them about the words used in chorus so that they can sing the next time, a very proud and pleasant sight indeed. Sitting at our place, if we look around, it’s only boats,water and people… the energy and enthusiasm level shown by boat men were just amazing.

 

                                    There were several lovely moments, though the highlight was when there were a group of women who took up this challenge of boat racing and competed. The applause and cheers whenever they passed by only reinstated the fact that it was very well appreciated. In that group, there were half dozen foreigners seen dressed in typical Kerala Saree’s trying their hands on rowing. When their team won, the happiness they showed, the cheerfulness they exhibited epitomised the mere reason of why this race was considered to be very famous.

 

                                    The Vallams(in Malayalam) which are typically called as Snake boats are indeed very pleasant to look at, anybody who sees it would appreciate the efforts of over hundred men sitting in that giving their heart and soul just to reach the finish line. Apart from those 100 people sitting and rowing, there were a handful of people-standing-in and driving the others with enthusiastic drills. Couple of them usually are involved in creating this rhythmic music by beating on the boat deck using the huge planks, just to create the synchronisation among the team.As such it’s a culmination of team work well portrayed. The sight itself was breathtaking.

 

                                   Though it was sometimes uncomfortable sitting in the same place for hours together, the thrill, energy and the dedication people have shown in having this event organised is simply mind boggling and made us forget anything which bothered us. Having got introduced to the city life, the typical culture which was portrayed, just brought smiles to our faces, we know we are in right direction with such festivals. Yes, I prefer to call it that way, when we witnessed the last race the closest one of all, four of them trying to out run each… in front of our eyes we witnessed what we felt was a fitting finish to this exemplary portrayal of the amazing culture. At the end we knew… it was worth it.